Thoughts

So, I'm sitting here thinking... but I'm not thinking. I can feel my mind move, but it's not really doing anything at the same time. It's one of those times I hate the most. I can feel something wanting to get out, but I don't know what. Stifled creativity. It wouldn't be so bad if I knew how it wanted to escape.

It's like having something caught in your throat. It's a feeling that sort of presses into the top of your head and around your temples. Your head wants to explode and cave in at the same time. You don't want to sit still, but you don't want to move.

Stuck and confused... mentally constipated. But where does it go? How do you get it out? Is it another symptom of depression? Is it just something that you're stuck with? How do make it stop?

It's really rather irritating. Supposedly this writing should help, but it's not what wants to get out, not at all. It could make you crazy if you let it. So what now? The words aren't flowing like they should, they're just sort of made up as things that come out, slowly and tortured. They don't flow, each has been purposely formed to come out in an attempt to stop this heavy feeling in my head.

The feeling of explosion, of too much creative power stuck, unable to go anywhere. Maybe it's not creativity, maybe *I* just feel stuck. Stuck in the same places as always. Overlooked, forgotten, unneeded. It's depressing isn't it?